Sometimes the hardest part of marriage is loving your spouse like Christ loves us. That means doing everything His way. It means working to be a part of positive growth and change thru love and kindness. And pretty much none of the other method of persuasion we would usually try. Overwhelming love and kindness will bring change, but it takes time and patience. Dying to self daily is not easy. Resisting the urge to just grab the wheel is hard. Wanting to just take control and say what you feel you need to say just for one day is tempting, but it won't work. It is counterintuitive, but moving closer to your spouse means moving closer to Christ. Love always wins!